I am Back

So I am vlogging again, I really missed it. So let’s see how this goes. Check out yesterday:

If you have time to Lean

Tomorrow (which is today) will have a mental health update on the last 5 months. So stay tuned.

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Master Bra’tac

As most of you know by now, River didn’t work out for us and it broke our hearts. I do know she was adopted again(that’s all I know). Well we weren’t looking to get another animal for a long time again after our failed adoption. And then a someone on our local mom’s page posted about a kitten who was 9 months old at the time. C was actually gone to an Aggie football and out of pocket, when I saw him. There was something about his picture I was drawn to him (and I had always had dogs growing up). So we went to meet him, he was sweet and loving. His name was Alex back then but that would never do. I brought him home and he spent the first two days hiding (but after talking to a few people that’s normal for cats). Now he follows C and I everywhere, he meets C at the door every evening meowing. His favorite place at the moment is under the Christmas tree. Who knew it I was a crazy cat lady who just had dogs all this time.

The picture that drew me in.

Just the other night.

Yawning caught at the right moment.

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Reading Anyone?

I love reading, I have been reading more comics and graphic novels lately then I have been actual books. It still counts I am reading. What have you been reading? Things that I have really enjoyed reading right now are:

So far I am really enjoying it more then the show. I am about half through the first compendium. The character development is way better then the show.  Abby and Gabe lent me the first the 2 to read and it is taking me a while but I am getting there. 


I really like the theory behind this book and anybody being able to get their house clean in manageable chunks of time. No marathon cleaning here and it encourages you to never give up even if you back track a bit.  

Things I want to read: 


I really enjoy her YouTube Videos, So I think having her method in which I learn the best would be awesome. I also have a stack of Graphic Novels, I want to read. It is just sitting down to read them. I will share more in the next couple week. Tell me what your reading? 

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Breaking Up

I never thought this would happen but one of my first loves and I are breaking up and I will say it is probably for the best. Napping, I will miss you but I don’t know how see you in moderation. I even set alarms and I turn them off and end up making a hour long nap 3 hours long. That doesn’t work for anyone in my house. So bye bye old friend, hopefully I can accomplish more in the hours I won’t be napping.

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How do I?


I am not talking so much about our family budget though to be honest we could be better.


I get $100 a month to spend how I please and I swear that it is gone in like a day and I have no Fucking clue how. And then I am taking money out from our family budget and all that does is hurt my family. You may say just stop spending but sometimes it isn’t that easy, I need to relearn my spending habits and I don’t know where to start? I am an impulse shopper and I know that needs to change. Also I have cancelled all beauty subscriptions even though I did that a while back to be honest.  And that saves me like $30 a month and I am not getting over whelmed with beauty crap I won’t use. I want to be able to save some of it so that when I want something a little more ridiculous that I have the money to do it. So tell me how to work on impulse spending and internet spending, I am also the queen of checking out before I have even realize it.

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Tech Fail, I guess?

Tech Fail


I bought this little camcorder of Amazon last year, and I don’t know why. Wait strike that I do know why, I wanted to make youtube videos. Well I guess I was naive thinking a camera under a $100 would work well. I didn’t make as many videos as I hopes but the last couple I have made I noticed how much the quality had gone down hill. So after talking with C and being shut down on buying another camera, I talk about how I struggle with money here. And being mad for a couple of days, and a little research. Funny how when C suggest something no that will never work.  I realized I a spoiled but alas that I have an Iphone 7 Plus with the big memory. Which means while it might not be perfect it will defiantly meet my needs. So wish me luck on this new adventure.


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Good Times

So I have let the boys stay up late a few times this summer. Well flag football starts this Saturday and has three practices a week till school starts. So tonight they asked if they could stay up as late as they could. Knowing fair well that Ian would be the one to push the envelope. And I was right come eleven, Ollie came up and hugged me and told me he was going to bed. I was surprised he made it that long, he loves sleep. I just looked back and Ian is laying on the couch so he might not make it much longer. Why did I agree to this you may ask? Well some off my fondest summer memories is staying up all night (if not all night pretty late) with my Dad playing video games or watching movies. So I want my boys to remember the good times.

Shh nobody move they are snuggling.

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Late Night Musings 

We are 5 mintues from midnight when I started this post. River is resting her head on my hip snoring away, I thought she was annoyed that I was still up. Then she came to snuggle me, so I think she maybe is warming up to me.  She was so standoffish at first. Though she already loves Ian, when he goes up stairs she sits at the baby gate and waits for him.  Why am I awake? Well the left side of my head, ear, and throats hurt. I have no reasoning for why it hurts. I am wondering if it is because I still have my wisdom teeth and the pressure the tooth puts on things. 

I should go to bed, the boys went to bed early tonight cause they were both tired. Which means they will be up early.  And I will be regretting this late night. Though sitting alone in peace and quiet is very relaxing. What do you do to relax?

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Trials and Tribulation

Last year I talked about going back to school to become a real estate agent. Well, I lasted like a month in school before my mental health blew up. I probably should have been hospitalized last summer. Getting out of bed was literally painful. A medication changed help but didn’t complete fix it. So I stopped doing the work for the program, and things started looking up. It took me till March to admit to myself and C that I wasn’t gonna be able to mentally handle working. So now I need to find an attorney to help with the process of getting disability. And if you have problem with me looking for assistant, keep it to yourself until you walk in my shoes. Even after admitting this, and things looking up I still ended up in the mental hospital for a week over Easter holiday, for suicidal and homicidal thoughts. And with that stay I had to change providers to one covered by my insurance after paying cash since January because the providers on my insurance all work out of MHMR. And I will say that having gone through MHMR when I didn’t have insurance after Ollie was born, I felt like I was a cattle being put through a chute. Enough about that, I am now being seen by an MHMR provider in my home county. I have seen my provider twice and he is gruff but sadly I have no other choice (That Rant is a whole other post, comment if you want me to write it). So much happened this spring that I can’t talk about cause it isn’t my story alone to tell but lets just say that I became strong enough to get rid of some of the toxicity in my life. Doing so I feel so much better then I have felt better in years. Mental health is unpredictable and who knows where I will be in a few weeks.


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