When the Phone Rings

Some of the things you never want to hear are, are you sitting down, now don’t panic: cause you know news that you are about to recieve is news you don’t want to hear. That is what happened to me tonight, my step mom called me to tell me that my Daddy had been in a car accident and they were taking him to hospital via ambulance and she was 15 minutes behind him. That was all she really knew and that the guy that had hit him had drove off but had lost a lincense plate and they were trying to track him down. So I raced to find shoes, socks and get out the door leaving Casey in the middle of fixing dinner and Ian in the middle of a meltdown (I think he coudl feel that I was upset). So after what felt like forever but was record time I made it to down town Ft. Worth from Dallas (there was very little traffic suprisingly). To find my dad awake, talking, and about to have some test done. So I went out to the waiting room to sit with my family (my daddy is the oldest of 5 and the only son) while out there my Aunts lovingly picked at me, I got to catch up with a couple of cousins. Once all the test were done they said he was very lucky and could go home, just take it easy and rest. After hearing from my one of my Aunts who drove past it(not realizing it was my Daddy’s Car, he had already been take from the scene) and My stepmom my Daddy is very lucky. If there would have been a passenger they would be dead. Also I would like to thank one of my former classmates mom who was one of the first on the scene, for trying to help my Daddy and in the process breakign her own ankle. To the ASS that hit my Daddy and drove off, I understand accidents happen that I am not upset about (heck I have been in my fair share). It is the driving off that pisses me off, you are one lucky SOB to be in jail because if I had my way I would string you up and let the county see you for the ball less coward that you are. You better be glad my Daddy’s ok, otherwise the wrath of my family would have been painful. Also would it have killed you to at least called for help before you abandoned him alone and out of it in his car?

*To my readers this post is a release of my feelings, so please forgive me for mispellings and such.

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Nose to the grind Stone and Pity Party

March 22:
Today I hit the ground running at work. I started at a new store today so it is gonna take a while to get things cleaned up and organized, the vendors have been left alone for far to long. I spent hours pulling ratholed bottles and I not even half way finished. I left them a nice note saying we aren’t gonna have that anymore. I am gonna try being nice before I go into bitch mode.

March 26:
I have now been working for 3 days. I was supposed to have today off but my store is in such bad shape that I came in today to work on it some more. I am happy with the store in general it seems to have a more laid back vibe then my old one. I do miss some of my coworkers from my old store. The best thing happened when I came home from work on Sunday, Casey was burping Ian and when he noticed I was in the room he sat up straight and went oooooo. That melted my heart.

My 24 birthday is coming up in 12 days. I am excited and a little sad, I have always had something to look forward to even when it is nothing more than having people come over for dinner. This year is different I have no plans other then to work, I get off at 7 its not like I couldn’t do something. It is just tough to try and plan something. We are the first in my husbands group of college friends (I like all of these people they were just his friends first) to have a baby. So I now sometimes feel as if when they invite us to stuff is more out of obligation then them wanting to see us. I know that is probably not true but sometimes it’s how I feel. So for me to plan something with them would mean a course of no were all busy thanks maybe next time. Mostly all I really want is like three hours with my husband at home alone to watch a movie and hang out, but that isn’t possible because my mom Can only baby sit here and our previously mention friends more then likely wouldn’t want to watch Ian. The only couple that has ever offered 30 minutes away and to take him there and back just to gives a few hours alone makes me feel like I am burdening them.

Casey’s becoming more and more discouraged and it is taking its toll on me. I understand why he is, but I am the type of person that when the people I love become stressed and discouraged I become that way too. I know I am supposed to be the person he can lean on, but I am just as stressed as he is if not more. I am worried what if he can’t find a job what will happen to us. I don’t mean our marriage or anything like that, I love my husband so much. I couldn’t imagine going through this with anyone else. I am just so scared about what will happen when our savings run out. The money I make working and the unemployment benefits are no where near what he was making. We don’t live beyond our means but we still have 2 car payments, rent and other small things that have to get paid every month. I know it will all get worked out in the end I just need to relax.

Sorry for the pity party, I just needed to vent a little. On a happy note my 2 year wedding anniversary is fast approaching.

Casey and I shortly after we found out I was with child and him starting his new job last year. He got laid off last year around this time too. Boy aren’t we lucky. We came out the last lay off better off. We will come out of this one smarter and better off this time too (hopefully we won’t have the same surprise with this one).

Waiting for the Phone to ring

Is killing me. Casey had his interview on Fri. and they said they would call him on Mon. or Tues. still no call. The pessimist in me thinks he did not get the job, and they just don’t want to call and tell him this. Casey on the other hand is all like they will call they said to check out housing in the town this interview was in. So he is all like they are gonna, I think he is being stupid and refusing to face reality.
Well then last night my cousin calls and says that she is going to try and work it out with her husband. I know that this is going to sound bad I broke down in tears, all I could think of is her 2 little girls and how bad of an example she is setting for them. In the six years they have been married I think that he has cheated on her more times then I know of and everytime she gets pregant he does it. She is currently 5 months pregant with his 5 child (he has 2 from a previous marriage). Then when they are together he treats her like crap. Her response to this is he is the father of my children. Well I am sorry being with someone cause they are the father of your child is not good enough . The icing on the cake is the girl he has been sleeping with just found out she is pregant and she told my cousin she is gonna get an abortion, I don’t believe her. My cousin does, I just wish that she could realize that she isn’t hurting just herself when she jumps back in this stupid circle.