This post is brought to you by the letter C, for Crazy, Cookies, and a bit of Cranky.
Oh my Ian woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning, everything is making him angry. Even the things he ask for. After 3 time outs in less then 15 minutes an one attempt to hit me in the face. We finally reached a turning point, he is now cuddling me while watching one of his Smurf dvds. I know that I shouldn’t solve a problem with tv, but I am so glad to not being screamed at for a moment.
I am now 11 days Paxil free, man last week was killer. I had no patience for anyone or anything, I sanpped and my poor husband and Ian over everything. This week dawned to me feeling more normal then I have in a while. Minus some tears over some silly things.
Wow, I can’t believe that we are about to start a new year. This past year has been the toughest that I have faced in a long time. I pray and hope that 2011 is kinder to us, we start this year in a very similar situation. I am pregnant again, this time I am praying for a different out come then with Ryan Jane. I don’t think I am strong enough to go through all that again. Actually I know I am not strong enough to deal with any of the big hits we were dealt last year again this year. I know if I had to I will do it, but this year I pray for a a year of peace and rest. Please lord let my soul have a little peace and time to heal and rest from the past 3 years of stress.
I need to be up cleaning the laundry room, but I am sitting watching last nights Dog The Bounty Hunter, and crying my eyes out. Well after this morning I deserve a moment to myself. If you made it through all this you deserve a prize, but instead I offer a picture of Ian enjoying his Christmas gift from my Daddy.