With the packing for the upcoming move in full swing it makes me a little sad to be closing the door on this place. It is the place we brought Ian home from the hospital. As I take pictures down off the wall and wrap them safely before placing them in boxes, I am overcome by sadness. I have always been this way, my room growing up never had blank walls. I love to be surrounded by pictures of my friends and family. I have been this way for as long as I can remember. As all of the touches that made this place become my own are stripped from the walls, contents removed from the cabinets and as closets are emptied. I feel a little lost amongst the sea of cardboard boxes. What does one do during the transition to not lose there mind?
I am feeling very lost right now as if you couldn’t tell. Maybe it is the move that is making me feel like I am lost but I am at a crossroads in my life right now,you may wonder why it is that I think that I am at a cross road? Well I am going to try and go back to school in the spring, I am going to start slow and only take one online class. I wish I could say that this was certain, but due to unknown fiances we won’t know until later.I am excited about the possibility of going back to school, I miss learning. I have finally decided on a major that takes me out of retail, something that is more family friendly. I am both scared and excited by this choice. What is this choice you ask, I am going to major in history with a minor in German. I am hoping to use this degree to teach high school US. history and maybe a few German classes thrown in. I am also so very lost on my walk with God that I think that it has begun to effect my personal life. I want to get back into going to church but I the thought of having to attend an unknown amount of churches to find the one that works best for us is a daunting challenge. We have decided to go off any form of birth control and let what happens, happen. I know that this is exciting news for my family but please don’t ask me every time I talk with you if I am pregnant yet. We will tell everyone when it happens when we are good and ready. I see why I feel lost, I am surrounded by unknown. Wish me luck as I make the unknown become known.